Theosexuality: A Man’s Perspective

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

Let’s talk Theosexuality: in the early months of 2018 e.v. I followed, supported, and encouraged the writings of Sister Georgia; as someone who has invested the last 20 years of his life in the Thelemic milieu, I have learned that what it needs is more empowered voices of empowered Women (with a capital W).

This is, in fact, a realisation that dawned on me only in the past couple of years, when I finally unlocked a fundamental achievement, and learned to stop and listen. To go back to my centre, and to open myself up to what others had to say: for someone like me, who displays a rather evident narcissistic tendency, which has been fuelled by the fact that I have achieved quite a lot already in my life, it was quite the paradigm-changer.

So I listened, and I realised that we are living in truly exciting, if chaotic, times: we are on the verge of the next big cultural shift, and the Age of (Unbridled) Communication ushered in by the Internet 2.0 of social media opened a Pandora’s Box that will never be closed. We are now forced to face up our privileges, and we are forced to face the harshest reality of all: that most of us, here in the West, have lived at the expense of every other group on Earth for… well, forever, basically. At the very top of this pyramid of abuse there is me: the rich, white, cis male.

Trust me when I tell you that to really understand what it meant to “check my privilege” took me years. And did I fight it, again and again. I was amongst the ones posting early memes against “cultural appropriation”, or lamenting the “crazy rise of unchecked feminism gone mad”. And then I realised it was all just an unconscious reaction to the realisation that yes, I was born in absolute privilege, and yes, the times where you could just get away with that were over.

Now… once you realise something like this, you can either fight it, or you can accept it. Because don’t be fooled: cultural seismic shocks like the one we are experiencing now will not stop for you, or for me, or for anyone else. You only decide either to oppose them, as many of the neo-reactionaries around the world seem to be doing, along with the pathetic alt-right Pepe squads (are those still a thing?); or you can accept the change, and adapt to it. Once Pandora’s Box is open, you can never close it.

And let me tell you: those who have decided to fight it are showing their ugliest side. You see these little men trying to shut the discourse down at every cost – because of course they know better, right? Thankfully, you see also a younger generation of men who are willing to listen, and to support their Sisters – their Women: I must thank Brother Sercan in particular, one of the few I ever sponsored into an O.T.O. Degree beyond Minerval, for a very fruitful discussion on Sister Georgia’s last article that generated the rest of this piece.

Sister Georgia is setting a very high bar for men to achieve. It is very difficult when you are riddled with your own problems, inadequacies, and areas of self-improvement as a male to always appreciate what she is writing, because she smacks you in the face with her words and the initial smack you receive forces you to do what ego does best: get defensive. I had plenty of negative thoughts popping up in my mind like “slut shaming” in a similar manner described in this article when I read her earlier works, but I forced myself to attribute these toxic thoughts as outputs of my own broken internal monologue.

Only a man who is confident in himself, who is sovereign and whole, can fully appreciate what she is saying. I suppose many readers get stuck at that first, toxic stage because, for most of us, there is so much work to be done before we can get beyond that.

There is nothing wrong in accepting that there is work to to be done on the self, to improve one’s self – especially for men. Many guys get defensive, because they feel little and inadequate next to the overwhelming depths of a fully independent female. This is why they call them ‘sluts’ – you cannot tame or keep a ‘slut’ chained up in your own front garden; she will lie only where her Will tells her to.  You can’t tie her to a post; she needs to be attracted to your gravity. And this is problem with modern men: they have no gravity, and then they moan about the need for it.

Men use sex for many different reasons (as, of course, do women); if he feels inadequate he uses sex to dominate the other gender, to make a false positive of his own emptiness. The sense of conquest in finding and filling a vulnerable victim gives him the illusion that he is whole and supreme – an illusion which only leads to further abuse. Unfortunately, legal battles are not an efficient or healthy way to combat this abuse, and Sister Georgia explains beautifully why. There is only way to end it: returning Divinity back to sex.

As Men (with a capital M), we should strive to be become whole within ourselves first. The need to achieve an illusory sense of fulfilment through the abuse of another human being would no longer exist if we were truly content with who we were. It doesn’t make me less of a man to admit that I need to work on my issues, that I have issues and that these issues are the reasons behind my broken misogynistic thoughts and justifications. On the contrary, the process actually makes me more of a man, as I am increasingly able to appreciate the depths of a woman who is striving for a similar sense of sovereignty, who is fighting her own battles. It also takes sex into a whole new level, allowing it to become an act of worship, a dance of sovereign Gods.

If we don’t do this, it is pointless to even try and pretend to be Magicians or Adepts. Magick is the Art of Life, as Crowley stated.

And far too many of these sad little people fail at this Art rather spectacularly.

Love is the law, love under will.

[originally published on Thelemic Union]